Inspired by the Bathrobe Mum

I was picking my kids up from school the other day and I saw a Mum come through the front gate wearing a bright blue, ankle length, terry towelling bath robe and matching slippers.  I LOVED IT.  I was so excited to see someone brave enough to just put it out there – this is what is going on for me today – take me as I am.  

The most common thread of stress and anxiety I find when working with Mothers is that the pressure of living up to the external image of a great mother (whatever that is for them) becomes more of a burden than the actual mothering part of Motherhood.  We are bombarded with images of mothers… back on the catwalk 3 months post baby, travelling around the world in designer clothes with perfectly dressed and perfectly behaved children in tow.  Information about what we must do, shouldn’t do, could do and heaven forbid wouldn’t do.  Where is the information saying you have kept your child safe and mostly happy, made a meal and brushed your hair – CONGRATULATIONS you made it through a day being a mother?

Are we making it more difficult for ourselves by buying into unrealistic expectations of Mothers and judging any vulnerability as weakness or failure?  I think so!  For many of us it feels way too scary to show vulnerability and easier to present our personal version of perfect.  Short term maybe it is but long-term it is by far the hardest option and the most damaging.  Let me be clear, I am not saying give up, let it all hang out, consequences be damned.  I am saying we should always strive for our best but on the days when your best is a bathrobe and slippers then I say GO FOR IT!   Celebrate those days and the days when it’s power lipstick and move over Angelina Jolie I’ve got this.  Embrace it ALL.  Brené Brown says it best in her book Daring Greatly: How the Courage to be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead.  “Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they’re never weakness”.  It is when we show our vulnerability that we will receive the greatest support or a standing ovation for being you because you are living out loud. When we decide to make the shift from presenting an image of ourselves to actually being ourselves, who we are day by day, that is where our freedom lies.

So in honour of this post this is what is going on for me today.  I am working from home, I have a cold, I thought I might go to the gym but probably won’t, hence the decision to put the Ugg boots on.  Will I pick my kids up from school in this outfit?  No, I’m not quite there yet but I will share it with you.  Will you share where you are today on our Facebook Page?  Fabulous or Fabulously Vulnerable?

Show us, either way it’s all good!!

 

 

Mother of a Mindset. Step Five: Movement

I quoted Harvard Medical School psychiatrist and author John Ratey in my original blog post for Nourish. He states – “Exercise is the single best thing you can do for your brain in terms of mood, memory and learning.” The health benefits of exercise are well documented and we are discovering more and more that the mental benefits of exercise are just as great.

Neuroscientist Judy Cameron, Ph.D writes in this Huffington Post article “Increased blood flow benefits the brain. Immediately, the brain cells start functioning at a higher level, making you feel more alert and awake during exercise and more focused afterward. When you work out regularly, the brain gets used to this frequent surge of blood and adapts by turning certain genes on or off. Many of these changes boost brain cell function and protect from diseases such as Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s or even stroke, and ward off age-related decline.Exercise also triggers a surge of chemical messengers in the brain called neurotransmitters, which include endorphins, often cited as the cause of the mythical “runner’s high.” The brain releases dopamine and glutamate, too, to get those arms and legs moving, as well as gamma-aminobutyric acid, or GABA, a prohibitive neurotransmitter that actually slows things down, to keep you moving in a smooth and controlled manner. You’ll also likely feel better thanks to a bump in serotonin, a neurotransmitter well-known for its role in mood and depression.”

I asked Meg Campbell, owner and Wellness Coach at Live Life Personal Wellness, the exercises she believes are the best you can do for mental and physical reward.  Drawing on her 20 years experiences as a Personal Trainer, Teacher and Wellness Coach she gave me her top three.

1. Cardiovascular exercise outdoors
Whether you are a seasoned runner or simply​​ ​enjoy a brisk walk, the fresh air combined with cardiovascular exercise, is important for your body and mind. ​Head to the park with a skipping rope, go for a bike ride, Rollerblade or even take up a team sport .Find something you love, get outdoors and enjoy it! If you ​have a good exercise history you can combine some High Intensity Interval Training (HITT) to your exercise of choice. Remember to ​inhale the ​fresh air ​using​ deep diaphragmatic breaths​!​ This will connect your mind and body and help with stress reduction.

​ ​2. Resistance training
​ Strength training is a wonderful form of exercise for women. Increases in bone density, metabolism, muscular strength and changes in body composition are some of the benefits you can expect if you perform resistance training 2x/week. You don’t have to be a member of a gym, bodyweight exercises can be just as effective. Alternatively you could purchase some home equipment such as gymsticks, kettlebells, dumbbells, power bands or TRX and have a qualified trainer design a home program for you.

3. Mind Body Exercise
​We live in a busy, fast paced world so balancing your exercise regime out with nurturing, supportive activities, proven to reduce stress and anxiety, is a great idea. Yoga, Tai Chi and Pilates are fantastic options that ​have numerous benefits including; stress ​ reduction,​ ​increased pelvic floor and core strength, enhanced body awareness, increased flexibility, muscle tone and a stronger ​connection between​ your mind and body ​.

I created a Mother of a Mindset Pinterest board that has more information and video’s of the exercises Meg has mentioned.

If the endorphins, the mental health and the physical benefits are not enough to get you sprinting off the couch then use the other Mother of a Mindset steps, Cause or Effect?, What you Focus on is What you Get, and Be on a Mission , to create a successful pattern of thinking, a routine, habits and behaviours that will make it impossible for you to not get going!

Enjoy!